Stay single or marry: Choice lies with us
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Jun 12, 2012 - ST Forum
I AGREE with Dr Andy Ho ('Single by choice, and content'; last Thursday) that it is fine to be single.
Ultimately, the choice lies with the individual.
Some people lament that their lives have been destroyed by marriage, others fear that if they remain single, they will be lonely for the rest of their lives.
Some people enter into marriage blindly, only to divorce within a few years.
In Asian societies, worried parents push their children to get married, fearing the children will have no one to take care of them.
I know this as my worried mother and elder sister are always telling me to get married.
When my maternal grandmother died this year, her three unmarried children were left feeling very lonely. This got me thinking about my own future.
Should I find a man and get married? Will I have someone to take care of me when I fall ill, and someone to confide in when I am feeling helpless?
But what if my future husband is a wife beater or cheats on me?
Ultimately, the choice lies with us. No one can decide the future for us.
Melanie Maniam (Miss)
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Indeed. As an individual you have your own mind. The policies are general policies aimed at addressing national issues . It does not necessarily apply to all individuals . e.g the stop at two policy. This was aimed at the masses then rightly or wrongly. Individuals need not have been over influenced by the media ( if they exercised their minds a bit) . If they were rich enough to have 4 or 5 they went ahead!
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Too many what ifs. Ultimately living is a choice. Choice involves risks. If we don't take risk, we mind as well not live. We as human beings must be willing to learn from mistakes and acknowledge we are not perfect but we try our best.
One has to think hard about life choices. If one wants to live single then please do it with no regrets and no looking back. However if one has doubts then it may mean one is actually wanting to have relationship.
We are human beings build for relationship. We were never design to live alone. Just look at us, we live in organisations, office, temple, go to work by MRT or at home with the family. Everything is systemic and in groups.
Of course before we make decision, we must make it with careful thought and consideration. You don't invest in shares or buy a house without thinking about how to raise cash and what the consequences for the future. Sure thing, when one goes to buy a house or a condo, one goes around the market and check the properties, ask property agents and friends for advice. The same goes for searching for your soul mate - go do your research. Find out if this person is suitable or not. Go out there and date more, increase one's chances of fnding the right mate.
There is risk life partner could be a wife-beater, a cheater or have irreconciable differences. But hey, its just as risky being a passenger of an airliner. The chances of flying, anything goes wrong, touch wood, like crashing could happen too. Like I said, everything takes risk. No pain no gain. If one wants to play safe hide in the cave, just do it lah but don't regret later on in life for not having anything done about it.
Life's hard. There is no magic answer. Everybody is struggling. There no guarantees in life - something could go wrong. Boils down to what choice you wanna make.
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marriage is about love. love happens naturally. if you have to think about it then its better not to get married because there is probably no love involved.
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Ms Melamine... moi saw chiur bf, Terry, with another maid called leticia...
true story...
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We need to grow gdp lah.
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Let's all get married and don't have kids. Govt also lan lan.
What for make them suffer in this Singapore of not-ours?
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life is about choice.
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Originally posted by Clivebenss:
life is about choice.
To Jiak $1.50 cai tao kway or $10 XO Cai tao kway...It's all about choice...
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Originally posted by ^Acid^ aka s|aO^eH~:
To Jiak $1.50 cai tao kway or $10 XO Cai tao kway...It's all about choice...
choice need money.
haiz.....
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Originally posted by SoulDivine:
Why do people live in fear?
Because of their beliefs in seperation. The belief in separation is the cause of fear.
We become fearful when we believe that we are seperated from the rest of the world and something outside ourselves can harm or hurt us or cause us pain and suffering.
In additional to fear of the outside world, we feel that we are seperate from our own True-Self (Higher self). We find it very difficult to listen to our own inner guidance and higher intuition. We fail to distinguish between the ego and the soul, both which are constantly communicating to us through our physical and emotional bodies.
Thus, we fear what is within ourselves. As a result, we become distrustful of our own abillities to do what is for our highest good and to our best interest. -
Originally posted by alize:
Let's all get married and don't have kids. Govt also lan lan.
What for make them suffer in this Singapore of not-ours?
do you really think they care if you get married or not? those people at the top dont live forever. they only plan for the future. they are all much older than you are and will most probably expire before you do. -
To be or not to be!
Hahahahahaha . . . .
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live yr life to the fullest.and with no regrets, there is no perfections
no venture no gain
no fuck no son
no reach no in - wen i putt on the green
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Originally posted by dragg:
marriage is about love. love happens naturally.
if you have to think about it then its better not to get married because there is probably no love involved.
Marriage is not just about love. It is about two persons willing to be committed to one another to live, work, love, care, support and even struggle together on life's journey . It also about honouring one's committment to one another , respecting one another, and giving and deserving of the trust of one another. -
Originally posted by Clivebenss:
life is about choice.
Either you contribute to CPF and taxes when you grow up
OR
You contribute CPF, taxes and 2 years NS + reservist time when you grow up.
Your choice.
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Originally posted by charlize:
Either you contribute to CPF and taxes when you grow up
OR
You contribute CPF, taxes and 2 years NS + reservist time when you grow up.
Your choice.
I have CPF.
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人生没有如果，�有结果跟�果。
if here if there in the end probably never happen.
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Originally posted by Clivebenss:
I have CPF.
You have cpf statement only.